Understanding Single Parents
Separation or independence might come as a big surprise to you. At first, you will most probably be feeling panicky finally realizing that you have to take care of your kids and never forget this, yourself as well. If you do not take care of yourself, then you do not make yourself immune to certain negative circumstances that may hinder the care and love that you can give your children. As a single parent, you have to assure yourself with good health. Aside from the fact that it could add up to your expenses, if you get weak, who will take care of your kids then? However, you can also see separation from a different light. As a single parent, you have to take control of your life, in different ways that are new and could turn out to be very exciting, as you learn to embrace and accept the changes in your life and the lives of your children as well.
Making decisions would not be the same because, now, the decisions you have to make should be supportive of your family. Once you are in a more effective control over your life and your kids’, it would be eventual that better choices should be made. These said choices are very effective of your relations with your parents, you children, the parents of your spouse, if your are single because of his or her death, or your ex-spouse, if you had either an annulment or a divorce. These choices are also capable of affecting your health and your happiness. However, due to misfortune, you could be having problems raising your kids.
You are not alone on this. There are quite a big number of single parents out there. There is no reason for you to isolate yourself from the world. There are also coaches who are always ready to advise you. You can definitely learn a lot from these coaches, parent coaches or kid coaches, and apply what you have learned in your life as a single parent. You can work as a so-called “team” with these coaches to prevent problems within your family. They will be giving you advices that can do so; all you have to do is read on. As a single parent, you must not force your children to trust you. If this whole single parent thing is okay with you, it might not be the same thing with them. Trust is not bought, it is gained.
If your kids are finally comfortable having you as their only parent, you will know so. Your kids will just eventually learn to solve their own problems the right way and accept the decisions you will make because of trust, and not force. It is in truth that children can get really stubborn at times; it is already part of their system. But do not, under any circumstances, punish your kids. If you will submit your kids into punishment when they do wrong, they will most probably grow old evading responsibilities rather than to accept them. Yes, parenting has indeed evolved. Parenting in the society today is very different from the kind of parenting that your parents grew up with. The rules have changed and there was a rapid increase of the dangers of your children. If you go to certain experts on this kind of situation, they will probably tell you to put your child on time out. This is not a very helpful advice but still, you must not put the professionals to blame for they, too, are products of society.
They most probably grew up in the same kind of parenting as you did. What you most definitely need, as a single parent, are tools and a step by step know how in finding and attaining new hope and happiness, together with your family. There are various kinds of single parents. Some are single parents because of a divorce, some were not even married at all, other single parents are such because they were widowed, and some, dut to a very kind heart, adopted those unfortunate children to give them a better life. Whatever it is that led you to being a single parent does not matter, what matters is the ife that you have now being a single parent to your kids.
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